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eTips | April
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 4/12/2024Encourage your teen to experiment with science
Help your teen discover the mystery, wonder and fun of science by making hands-on connections together. Your teen's teacher may be able to suggest simple experiments to do at home that can help your teen understand concepts the class is learning. Many websites also offer ideas for student experiments. Encourage your teen to choose lab science courses at school, too. Labs let students experience science in action.
Teens who skip school miss out
Research shows a strong link between students' attendance and grades. Do you insist that your teen be in every class on time every day? Don't allow skipping school for an athletic event, or to miss a test your student is unprepared for. Make it clear that your teen should not skip one class in order to complete work for another. And take the fun out of staying home sick. Any teen who is too sick for school is also too sick to stream shows or surf social media.
Help your teen be stronger than peer pressureMany teens say that if pressured by friends, they would probably do something they wouldn't normally do. To help your teen stay strong in the face of a tough situation with peers, listen compassionately when your teen talks about it, but don't back down on your expectations. Help your student develop strategies for responding to the pressure, and offer praise for doing the right thing. "Going against the crowd takes guts. I'm proud of you."
Encourage reading with appealing material How can you encourage more reading when your teen just isn't interested in picking up a book? One way is to ask about a book your student did enjoy. (Or that at least wasn't too bad.) Suggest that your teen see if the author has written other books and try one of them. You might also suggest a fast-paced mystery. Try reading one aloud. If you can get to the "good part," your teen may become interested in reading the rest.
Be a buddy when your teen studiesHaving a "study buddy" to collaborate with while working can help students learn. To play this role, you can help your teen gather and organize information for a report or quiz. Or, demonstrate how to break large tasks down into smaller steps. You can make sure your teen understands assignment instructions. Or, listen as your student practices a presentation. And always, be sure to notice and praise your teen’s efforts and improvements.
Stay positive to encourage persistencePraising teens can boost their spirits and help them persevere when things aren't going well. But when your teen is struggling, it can be hard to find something to praise. Kids always know when you're not being authentic, so try to focus on whatever your teen has done right. You might say "That was a good try," or "This is difficult, but you've done other tough assignments and I know you can do it."
The Two Praise Rule encourages friendshipsTeens like to be friends with people who accept and encourage them. To help your teen be an encourager, suggest using the "Two Praise Rule." This means praising others at least two times whenever your student is part of a group activity. Then, help your teen brainstorm a list of supportive statements, such as "Nice try!" or "Great idea!" If you use them yourself with your student, your teen will be more likely to use them with others.
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eTips |March 1
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 3/1/2024Provide positive alternatives to screen time
Everyone is spending more time with screens these days, and digital media can be a useful learning tool. But screens aren't the only way to experience the world. Here are some screen-free things to do together that will help your teen think and learn: Design a new board game. Make a family meal. Have a family Karaoke Night. Take a walk in a new place. Take turns bringing a news article to dinner and discuss what each person thinks about it.
Make volunteering a family project
When families volunteer together, the shared purpose strengthens their relationships. And performing a service helps teens learn about caring, teamwork and community. With your teen, think about causes your family cares about. Challenge your student to get creative about ways to help. Could you make and send cards to residents of a nursing home? Collect donations for a food bank? Spruce up a playground?
A lost button can be a responsibility lesson
To be successful in school and life, teens must learn to take responsibility for themselves. They must do their schoolwork on time and get enough sleep to do their best in class, for example. Teaching your teen to mend clothes encourages personal responsibility. Demonstrate how to sew a new button on that favorite shirt, then let your teen take over. Don't expect perfect results. Like all skills, it takes practice.
Give your teen a comprehension checklist
Your teen finished an assigned reading. But did your student fully understand it? Suggest asking and answering these questions: "Can I name the main ideas presented in the chapter?" "What are the supporting details for these concepts?" "How does this information compare with what I've learned in the past? " "Do I understand the conclusions presented in the material?" If your teen can't answer, it’s time to reread the chapter.
Be clear that missing school is not an option
Attendance matters for school success, and absences affect all students. Participating in class promotes learning. To show your teen that school attendance is a priority: Expect your student to attend every class, every day (except in cases of illness or emergency). Avoid making appointments for your teen during school hours. And if your teen skips classes, take it seriously. Make it clear that your teen has broken an important rule at school and at home.
Help your teen remember what needs to be done
Between schoolwork, activities and family obligations, teens have a lot of responsibilities and a lot to remember. Help your student keep track by using visual clues, such as notes or to-do lists. You can also provide creative reminders, like a flower on your teen’s desk as a reminder to water the plants. Each night at dinner, review the next day's schedule and talk about everyone's responsibilities.
Staying alert makes schoolwork easier
Teens don't always get enough sleep. So when they sit down to do schoolwork, many nod off. To help your teen stay alert during study time, encourage regular exercise. It boosts energy and will help your student fall asleep at night. Keep snacks light; eating too much can make teens drowsy. Also, encourage your teen to take a five-minute break to move around after every hour of studying. Above all, help your student stick to a bedtime that allows for adequate sleep.
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eTips | February 26
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 2/23/2024Involve your teen in discipline
Effective discipline doesn't mean punishing teens for behaving badly. It means teaching and motivating them to behave well. You are your teen's primary role model. If you want to teach that yelling when angry isn’t OK, use a calm tone when you feel angry. Involve your teen as much as possible in deciding on rules and what will happen if they are broken. When your teen complies, say you appreciate the effort.
Use expectations to show your teen the waySetting expectations is like giving your teen a road map. Without them, there's no guarantee your student will end up at the final destination. With them, your teen will be able to find the way. To make sure your map is clear, help your teen set education goals and figure out how to meet them. Have your teen create routines for schoolwork, and discuss the link between effort and outcome. Talking regularly about school also shows that you expect your student to take it seriously.
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Help your teen create a master scheduleTo handle competing priorities, students need to learn how to manage their time. Help your teen use a calendar to create a master schedule with time for assignments, activities and commitments blocked off. When there’s a big project due, have your teen estimate the time needed for each step and add it to the schedule. Then, challenge your student to identify time wasters (like playing on a phone or scrolling through social media), and find ways to limit the time spent on them.
Make the most of extra time
Leap year's extra day is the perfect day to teach your teen to turn small bits of extra time into study opportunities. So if dinner will be in 10 minutes, have your teen spend the time reviewing Spanish vocabulary. If your teen is going out with friends, suggest solving five math problems first. Such short sessions won't replace a longer study time, but your teen will be using time more effectively.
Use a log to see where all your time goesTime is a precious resource. Is your family making the most of it? To find out, set aside one week to have family members keep a time log. Every half hour, everyone should record how they spent their time. The time log will give you a clear picture of where each person's time is going. When you know that, you can make choices that are best for you, your teen and your family.
Fuel your teen’s brain with breakfastStudents who eat breakfast have more energy, work faster, concentrate better and score higher on tests than those who don't. For teen-friendly breakfasts, keep quick and easy items on hand, such as microwave oatmeal or hard-boiled eggs. Or let your teen eat nutritious, non-traditional breakfast foods, like peanut butter sandwiches or carrot sticks and cheese. If providing food is a problem, ask the school how to get help.
Encourage problem-solving with questions, not answersTeens are too old to rely on a parent to solve all their problems. But no one is too old for a little push in the right direction. When your teen comes to you with a problem, suggest brainstorming about what your student can do to solve it. Ask questions like: "What in this situation is working well?" "Can you think of any solutions?" "What results are you looking for?" "What would you have to do to get those results?"
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eTips | February 19
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 2/19/2024Jump start your teen with a confidence boost
Sometimes, students don't do their assignments because they lack confidence in their ability to do them. You can help your teen by staying positive. If your student is putting off doing a paper, say something like, "Writing can be hard, but I know you can do it. Why don't you tell me what you'd like to say?" Offer reminders of the hard things your teen has accomplished before, and be sure to notice and praise progress.
Help your teen understand two key lessons
"Two of the most important lessons children can learn are that they matter and that they are counted on," wrote columnist William Raspberry. One effective way to teach your teen these lessons is to set limits. If you set and enforce a regular study time, for example, you make it clear that your teen's education is a priority for you. When you expect responsible behavior, you show that you believe your teen can do it and you can count on it.
Before you answer, give your teen time to thinkBefore you answer your teen's questions or intervene to correct behavior or a mistake, stop and take a deep breath. The short break will help you avoid answering questions or making decisions your teen can answer or make independently if given time to think about it. You'll also avoid
acting or replying without thinking…and then having to apologize or change your mind.
Discover who and what is influencing your teenIn the teen years, family may no longer have as big an influence in teens’ lives. But it is important for you to be aware of how other influences, such as social media, friends, and TV and movies, are affecting your student. To find out, look together at some of the things your teen and your teen’s friends post online. Do they reflect your teen's values? You can also use favorite shows to begin a conversation about what matters to your teen.
Thinking like a teacher can improve test successThere are many things your teen can do to prepare for a test. One of the most useful is to think like the teacher. After your student studies class notes, suggest writing down questions your teen thinks might be on the test. Then, your teen should plan how to answer them. Chances are, some of the questions will show up on the test, and your teen will feel confident having thought through the answers ahead of time.
Help stop the bullying cycleIt's essential for families to help their children deal with bullies. People who are bullied often end up being bullies themselves. Stop the cycle. If you suspect your teen is being bullied, in person or online, say that you take the situation seriously and want to help. Offer reminders of your teen’s positive qualities. Encourage your student to find allies among teens who share interests. Then, notify the school principal or counselor and discuss ways to address the situation.
Reinforce the importance of learning from mistakesIt took Thomas Edison hundreds of tries before he found the right material for the filament of the light bulb. But each failure taught him what wouldn't work, and brought him closer to understanding what would. When your teen makes a mistake, brainstorm together about what can be learned from it. What other approaches could your teen try next time? Experience is a good teacher, but students sometimes need help paying attention to the lesson.
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eTips | January 26
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 1/26/2024Three preparation strategies lead to better essays
Your teen will face many essay tests and timed writing assignments in a school career. Share these tips for success: 1. Do the research before the test. The exact essay question may still be a mystery, but your teen can identify several examples from the material that could apply to a variety of themes. 2. Make an outline before writing. Opening paragraph, two to three examples and a conclusion. 3. Memorize a quote or two that could be useful in different contexts.
Suggest activities to promote writingStrong writing skills help teens in almost every subject in school. Help your teen find engaging ways to practice. Your student might enjoy writing stories for a younger sibling, writing captions for family photos, writing letters to request free samples or materials, or keeping a journal. These activities are meant to be fun. If your teen isn't interested, keep providing chances to write until one appeals.
Revive your teen's interest in readingAdults read to young children with vigor and inflection that makes books exciting. But that excitement often gets lost when teens read to themselves, particularly from "classic" books written in another era. To revive it, help your teen be an active reader. Take turns reading
passages aloud. Talk about what the words make you "see." Or read your own copy and discuss the action together. Your teen may also enjoy reading along with an audiobook version.Make time for some family show and tell
Show and Tell isn't just for little kids. It's a great way to encourage family conversations and help your teen build presentation skills. Pick a night and choose a theme, such as "Something I'm proud of," or "Something I've learned to do recently." Take turns showing and telling. Serve snacks and have fun. Your teen gets a safe opportunity to practice public speaking, and you'll all learn more about one another.
Your support helps your teen’s talents growWhat do many successful teens have in common? Their families have helped them develop their talents to the fullest. To foster your teen's abilities, focus on the positive. Make practice time enjoyable. Look for classes or a mentor to help cultivate your teen's talent. You might also consider learning your teen's skill yourself and spend time together doing it. And most of all, support your teen, win or lose.
https://tpitip.com/?34bB18608Ask for your teen's thoughts about a poor grade
"You could do better," you say when your teen brings home a poor grade. But your teen may hear
that as "You're not good enough." You don't have to praise a bad grade. But try to find something positive to say about your teen's work. Then, ask if your student is satisfied with it. Does your teen think the grade reflects the effort put in? What would your teen do differently next time? When the ideas come from your student, it’s just possible you’ll hear, "I could do better."
Help your teen deal with frustration about schoolIf your teen is upset about something that happened during the school day, don't ignore it. The problem may only get worse. Ask your student to explain the situation, but don't take sides if you hear "the teacher hates me." Instead, ask your teen for more details, and encourage talking with the teacher. Contact the teacher yourself if necessary. Explain how your teen is affected, and ask for the teacher's input. Open communication will help you work together to resolve the issue.
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eTips | January 12
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 1/12/2024What interests do you share with your teen?
As children grow, their interests change. Parents of teens often need to find new ways to talk, listen and just be together with their children. To renew your connection, find something that you and your teen share an interest in. Perhaps you could pursue a new hobby or learn a new skill together. Communication will flow naturally when you can talk about an enjoyable shared activity.
Show your teen how to look for answersTeens have a lot of questions. It's easy to provide answers if you know them. But it's better to teach your teen how to find the needed information. When you discuss ways to find and evaluate online sources and show your teen how to consult basic references, your student learns more than the answer to one question. Your teen will know how to find answers to future questions.
Discuss violence prevention with your teenPreventing conflict and violence is a top priority for schools. And families play a vital part. Talking to your teen on a regular basis is an essential first step. To begin a family dialogue about safety, ask questions such as, "What scares you?" "What makes you feel safe?" or "What are ways to solve a problem without hurting anyone?" Listen carefully to your teen's answers. Make it clear that you take this issue seriously.
Steer teen exploration in a positive direction
Teens are excited about trying everything life has to offer. This is often positive. But sometimes it can mean trying drugs, alcohol or other risky behavior. To steer your teen's desire to explore in positive directions, suggest signing up for a class that sounds interesting or trying a new sport that looks fun. Just make it clear that exploration often involves responsibility. Getting a part in the play means seeing the show through.
Use the news to strengthen thinking skills
The ability to form reasoned opinions by analyzing, evaluating and applying information is a key skill for school success. Encourage your teen to practice by providing a news editorial on a subject of interest. Then, have your teen underline all the facts and circle all the opinions. On another day, have your teen read the text of an article and write a new headline that summarizes it.
You don't have to have all the answers
Families sometimes worry that their teens won't respect them if they can't answer every question. But teens respect adults more when they admit they don't know and say "Let's find the answer." You don't have to answer all your teen’s questions immediately, either. If your teen asks a difficult question when you don't have time to respond, say "That's a tough one. I'd like to think about my answer and get back to you." Then, follow through.
Ask questions before hiring a tutor
If your teen is struggling with a subject, ask the teacher if a tutor would be appropriate and what resources are available from the school. If you choose to hire a private tutor, ask the teacher for recommendations. Then, before you select a tutor, consider these questions: What is the tutor's teaching experience in this subject? Will the tutor contact your teen's teacher? Will the tutoring take place in person or online? Private tutoring can be expensive, but some tutoring centers offer assistance and lower-cost options.
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eTips | January 5
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 1/5/2024Share four steps for improving reading recall
If your teen has trouble understanding and remembering reading material, share this four-step process: 1. Read the passage. 2. Put a piece of paper over the material. 3. With the material covered, try to recall and restate the information. 4. Uncover the passage to check accuracy.
Expect your teen to prepare for class
Students who don't prepare for class cost the whole class valuable time. When these students don't do their assignments and don't take responsibility for their studies, teachers must spend more time reviewing. This cuts into time for new learning activities. Reinforce the need for academic responsibility. Help your teen plan time to study and complete schoolwork. And make it clear that being unprepared also means facing the consequences.
Introduce your teen to adult responsibilities
Parents often shield their teens from family responsibilities. But in order to become responsible adults, teens need to understand these tasks. To help your teen learn what's involved in running a household, make a family responsibility chart. For each task, include the name of the person responsible, including yourself. Then, as a family, discuss ways to improve and share these job assignments.
Parent-tested tips boost student success
In a survey of parents of top students, four out of five said that getting a good education was the most important factor for their teens' future success. They offer this advice to other families: Teach your teen to value education. Expect your student's best effort, and offer support and encouragement. Discipline with consistency and fairness. Ask your teen's opinions often, and encourage independent thinking.
Test-taking is not a competition
Many students are competitive. But sometimes, being too competitive can hurt them in school. Racing to finish a test can lead to careless mistakes and incomplete responses. Remind your teen to use all available test time to double-check answers. Your teen may be among the last to finish the test, but there is a good chance scores will improve.
To make a point with your teen, keep it current
Does your teen tune you out when you talk about the future? Many teens find it hard to relate to a time that seems far off. You may be trying to explain that if your 10th grader doesn't develop better study habits, college will be tough. But to your teen, college seems a million years away. Instead, try linking study habits to a current event, like the math test your teen needs to do well on in order to keep taking driving lessons.
Start a conversation about reading
When students talk about what they've read, they often get more excited about it. Here are a few questions to ask your teen about reading material: What made this book interesting? Did it turn out the way you thought it would? How would you change the ending? Would you want the main character for a friend? Why or why not? Have you experienced something similar to what the main character did?
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eTips | December 1
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 12/1/2023Talk with your teen about two ways to learn
In school, teens need to do two types of academic learning. Some subjects must be learned in depth, while others require a breadth of knowledge. Learning in depth involves digging into the details of a particular topic by reading lots of sources and drawing conclusions. To get a broad understanding of a subject, your teen may read about a wide range of topics in a single source, then think about how all the topics fit together.
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Diagrams help students organize ideas
Good writers need to be able to organize their ideas. Creating diagrams that illustrate the relationships between ideas helps. A flow chart, for example, can help your teen keep chronology straight when writing a narrative. Have your teen draw a series of boxes linked by arrows from left to right. In the far left box, your student should write the first event in the story. The next event goes in the box to the right, and so on.
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Encourage your teen to PAGE through reading
If reading complex material is a struggle, teach your teen to PAGE (Prepare, Ask, Gather, Evaluate) the way through. The method is simple. Have your teen: Prepare by browsing through the reading for about 30 seconds per page. Ask questions about key concepts. Gather information by taking notes. Evaluate knowledge by trying to answer the questions and tosummarize main ideas in detail.
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Keep an eye on your teen's time online
With teens online so much these days, you may be wondering how much time is too much? Video chatting or texting with real-life friends is an important way for your teen to maintain social connections. But if your student consistently avoids schoolwork or family in favor a digital device, take action. Ask to see the sites, games and apps your teen uses. Then, help your teen set limits, and encourage productive non-screen activities.
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Help your teen manage workload stress
It's not unusual for teens to face a large workload as the end of a term approaches. Some will feel stressed. To help your teen cope, be a supportive listener. Don't try to fix problems; just let your student vent. Then, ask questions that will help your teen figure out ways to manage: "Have you created a study schedule?" "Could you reschedule an activity?" Also be sure to encourage healthy eating and exercise, and make sure your teen gets plenty of sleep.
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Discuss tough choices with your teen
In many situations teens face, doing the right thing isn't easy. And sometimes, it may not even seem important; does it really matter if your teen decides to turn off the alarm and sleep through first period? But all choices have consequences. Missing class today makes it harder to catch up tomorrow. Discuss these hard choices. Make it clear that doing the right thing may seem harder now, but it will likely make your teen's future easier.
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Help your teen solve concentration problems
When students have trouble paying attention to teachers, it can have a negative effect on schoolwork. Ask your teen what's going on. Is your student bored? Frustrated? Preoccupied by a fight with a friend? Ask the teachers about concentration strategies that might help, such as relating your teen's interests to the things the class is learning. If attention difficulties seem severe, consult a doctor.
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eTips | November 10
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 11/10/2023Make family time something your teen will want more of
Supportive family relationships help students do better in school. To keep family time positive, involve your teen in planning family activities. Then, try to stay in the moment. Keep the conversation light and save serious talks about issues with your teen for private talks. Sometimes, there is no need to talk at all. Just enjoy one another's company.
Encourage your teen to create history time lines
Time lines are great study tools. They help students see how one thing led to another and put ideas into context. To make a time line, your teen should first set boundaries. When did the event begin and end? Then, your teen should identify contributing events, and summarize key points, such as who, what and where. Encourage your student to add pictures and to use color to distinguish different factors in the event.
Trade criticism for positive feedback
Often, when adults think they are giving helpful feedback, teens just feel judged and defensive. Your teen is more likely to listen when your feedback feels positive, rather than critical. So concentrate your comments on things that will bring measurable results. Suggest specific actions your teen can do to improve work or behavior. Then, follow up with positive encouragement.
Discuss questions that help your teen accept responsibility for learning
Many teens have a knack for placing the blame for poor grades elsewhere: on the teacher, on the subject, on the "stupid" test. To encourage accountability, discuss your teen's answers to questions like: Did I stay current with my assignments? Did I invest the time I needed to study? Did I practice recalling the material, rather than just skimming the reading? Remind your teen that learning takes effort, and by giving it, students get smarter.
There's more than one way to study for tests
Tests questions come in a variety of formats. Different study methods can help your teen prepare. For essay questions, have your teen put the main ideas in the material into question form and practice writing answers in complete sentences. For short-answer tests, learning facts in groups rather than one at a time is helpful. For problem-solving tests, daily practice in setting up problems and doing calculations is the key.
Take a strong stand against bullying
Most teens get teased at some point, but if the teasing is repeated and has a negative effect on your teen, it may have progressed to bullying. Bullying can happen in person or online. Take action if your teen has been hurt, verbally harassed or threatened, has had property damaged or stolen, or is being attacked because of personal background or beliefs. Notify the school principal or counselor and discuss how to stop bullying and support your teen.
Teens love to argue. But you don't have to respond
Debating uses your teen's reasoning skills. That's great for academic success. But constant arguments at home can be maddening! When a discussion is heading toward an argument, don't take the bait when your teen says something provocative. Just say, "How interesting" and walk away. Wait to get your own point across until a calmer moment. A teen who is looking for an argument is probably not listening to you anyway.
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eTips | October 30
Posted by Robert Mosteller on 10/27/2023Overcome Common Schoolwork Stumbling Blocks
Take Action Against Digital Cheating
The digital world is a wonderful resource. But it can make cheating easier, including passing someone else's work, or even a chat bot's work, off as a student's own. Tell your teen that this is stealing, just like taking something from a store. If you suspect cheating, discuss it with your teen. And take care not to put so much pressure on your student that cheating seems like the only way to meet your expectations.
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Encourage Curiosity and Deeper Thinking
The changes your teen is going through aren't only physical. They are intellectual, too. Your student is now able to think in a more abstract way. To strengthen thinking skills, encourage your teen to ask questions about the world and pursue the answers. Expect your student to find facts to support opinions. When your teen asks you questions, listen carefully and respond nonjudgmentally. And offer praise when your teen is inquisitive or creative.
Find Out What Your Teen Thinks
When you ask questions about what your teen thinks, not only do you show you care, you also learn more about your student's preferences, concerns and needs. And your teen gets practice in the art of verbal give-and-take. Try asking questions like: What do you like most (or least) about school this year? How do you decide who your friends are? What makes the greatest person you know great? What excites (or worries) you most about the future?
Cutting Class IS a Big Deal
Research shows that cutting class is often the first step in a downward spiral that can lead to falling behind and dropping out. If your teen has cut class, take action quickly, before a pattern develops. Stress the importance of attendance, and encourage your teen to ask for help if needed. Stay aware assignments, and establish time for your teen to complete them. Promote responsibility by expecting your teen to comply with rules and pitch in at home. Then, spend time together in ways that encourage talking and listening.
Encourage Effective and Efficient Studying
You can't take tests for your teen, of course, but you can help your student prepare for them effectively and efficiently. Encourage your teen to review class notes every day. Offer to quiz your student on vocabulary words, history terms or whatever material the class is learning. Then, before a test, suggest that your teen correct and study previous tests from that class and make a plan for answering questions the teacher may ask.
Exercise Helps Teens Stay Healthy...and Safe
Research shows that staying active and getting regular exercise not only helps teens stay healthy, it can also help them avoid risky behaviors such as underage drinking and drug abuse. Encourage your teen to try a variety of fitness activities. Even better, run, walk, bike or play an active game together. To make time, set limits on passive recreational screen use, and promote exercise as a healthy alternative.
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Preparation Helps Teens Cope with Math Anxiety
Some students get so anxious about math that their feelings of inadequacy become a self- fulfilling prophecy. Their performance suffers. Remind your teen that the secret to math success is practice and effort. Encourage your student to study math every day, make a note of anything that is confusing and follow up with the teacher. Daily review reinforces learning and helps teens see how much they do know.
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